Here I am at the end of the third week at my new job, and it still amazes me that I got it. I don’t have the experience, I barely have the knowledge, so how in heck do I get hired??
I’ve also learned more about something called imposter syndrome. It’s a new term to me, but the more I read about it, the more I’m convinced that I’ve been suffering with it my whole life. You may know it by it’s other name: Low self esteem. Here’s an article for you to read.
That what imposter syndrome is. It’s defined as not feeling worth and constantly having to prove one’s self. Sounds an awful lot like low self esteem. (Here’s an article on confidence quotes.)
I must make a confession. I’m writing this at work. By hand. Because I’m sitting and watching and asking questions. This type of training is new to me. I’m much more used to a different type of training. Much more reading and testing and hands on training. Having to sit and be patient while I’m learning is a new experience for me.
I’m learning all sorts of new terms and software and acronyms and … all sorts of stuff. I would share some of the alphabet soup with you, but I’m not sure what’s proprietary and what’s not.
Tomorrow also starts a new adventure for me. I’m going to be a part of DjangoGirlsKC for the first time and learn all about Python. Or at least start to learn about it. While I’ve played with Scratch from MIT, I’ve never really explored coding in depth. It should be interesting!
I have new ideas about my new career path. I’m contemplating network engineer. It’s a big, scary word and I might not ever achieve it, but I am considering it. Why not? I won’t reach it if I don’t try. Right?
I have new acquaintances: a grandmother, a couple of nerds and geeks, at least 4 veterans, and a member of the church.
I have a cubicle of my very own. That’s new. I’ve never had my own space before. I know some people don’t like that, but I’m having fun decorating my little space, and making it “mine.”
I have logins and a computer. I have 3 monitors, which is a new experience. I have a headset. I have drawers.
I have stability. I know the times I’m working. I don’t have any question about my paycheck. It’s going to be a set amount. As long as I work 40 hours a week, I get the same amount, every week.
My one word was given to me as new. I didn’t even choose it, it was given to me by a friend. (Thanks Mollie.) As I look over the past 6 months, I can see how right she was. This is a season of new for me.
And at the same time, it’s still a season of prayer, my word from last year. In this time of new, I find myself turning more and more to the old, trustworthy word of God.
By the way, do you like my new Bible? I finally got a journaling Bible so that I can draw in my Bible without covering up the words.
In turning to the old, I’m discovering new truths.
And isn’t that the way a relationship is supposed to be?
May we all discover the newness of God’s word. May we fall in love with His truth again and again and again.