Respect

I’m just going to say it.  There’s no beating around the bush, and there’s no easy way to say this.  Dale and I have been having trouble.  Serious trouble.  It seems like we are fighting all the time.  Or if we’re not fighting, then we’re not talking or something else that causes issues.

And all this time, I thought it was his fault.  He wasn’t listening, he wasn’t talking, he this, he that.

Last night, after I got off work, I was listening to K-Love.  The show is “Closer Look.”  But the topic last night was “Man-talk on Marriage.”  (For future reference, if you go to that page, you are looking for the week of 7/10/2017 – 7/16/2017.)  Yes, it is men talking about marriage.

And it got me.  It really truly convicted me.

Dale hasn’t been wrong.  It’s been me.  He’s doing his best, and I’m not listening.

More than that, I haven’t been respecting him.

Ephesians 5:33 says “ However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”  These men were saying that it was easier for women to love their husbands, because that’s in their nature.  But they think they are respecting their husbands, and really aren’t.

One of the men that was speaking told a story about a wife who bought a journal and tried to keep a record of something that she was grateful for or appreciated about her husband, and gave it to him after a year.  He was blown away that she did that.

And I got to thinking:  Why can’t I do the same?

I have been convicted that I have been very negative towards my husband.  He hurt me, and instead of forgiving him, I have been lashing out and finding other things, little minute detail type things, to hold against him.

And that can not be.  Not in a healthy marriage, anyway.

So after I had a heart to heart with myself and with God, I decided that I know the way this blog will be going for the foreseeable future.  I will be doing the Joy Dare again, only I will be trying to find three things about Dale that I am grateful for.

If you are a friend of his, please don’t mention this to him.  Let my change of attitude become present in my actions.  Let me surprise him.

If you are a friend of mine, please hold me accountable.  I need it.  And I also need your prayers, that I will maintain this, and that I will be truly changed, and that our marriage will become richer and fuller.

For God’s glory. May we become as Christ and his church.

Hugs, Melinda

I can’t believe I almost hit publish without three things for today.

  1. He works hard. He isn’t at VBS tonight because he’s working.
  2. He is a great singer. I love his voice and singing with him.
  3. He’s a good father. He truly loves his girls.
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