I should be asleep right now

It’s 2 am.  2:15 actually.  I usually go to sleep around midnight, if Princess has come home from work.

But I’m worried tonight, and that has meant that I distract myself with other things.  Like Facebook.  And Neverwinter.

Dale and I like to play Neverwinter together.  It’s an online game.  I play more for him than for me, but it’s fun.

So why am I worried?  Well, I’ve mentioned before that I’ve been sick a good portion of December.  But it’s viral.  And we’re passing it around the whole family.  Little Bit and Boo are both coughing.  Dale went to give Little Bit some medicine tonight, and ended up giving her an adult cough syrup.  I’ve stayed up to keep an eye on her.

And, well, Skye got into some chocolate today.  At least we think she did.  I’m keeping my eye on her.

And Nana has a skin/fur issue that I’m watching.

And then Princess.

Small background on Princess.  She turned 17 in February, and her biological mom kicked her out of the house in March.  She went to go live with her boyfriend’s family who she calls her parents.  Boyfriend broke up with her in October, so I asked her to come live with us.  She and boyfriend are currently “together” but not “dating” because they are working on “their problems.”

Clear as mud, right?

Princess went to a New Year’s Eve Party with boyfriend and then spent the night with boyfriend’s family.  She came running through this afternoon because she was late for work.  She sent me a text asking if she could stay at her parents’ house tonight.  Because she normally means boyfriend’s family, I said yes.

Turns out she meant biological family.  She came into the house with an attitude problem.  She talked with attitude.

And now, I’m sitting here worried for this child of my heart, and praying that she can make it through the night without being wounded even more deeply.  That when she returns, that hopefully, she will return, that we can sit down and have a civil discussion without the attitude problems.

I am fully aware of how much she isn’t mine.  Not legally.  Not biologically.  She’s a whirlwind most of the time.  She has an electric smile and a bubbly personality, but she’s a good kid.  She’s smart.  She’s both logical and emotional.  And she’s been hurt so very deeply.

So, I’m awake.  And worried.  And I should be praying for her.

But instead, I’m distracting myself.

I’m going to start the Joy Dare again.  I’m not going to count this time, and I’m not going to stress about it.  I’m going back to the goal of this blog.  To be grateful everyday.  The Joy Dare is simply a tool I used last year to help me achieve that goal.

Jan: 1: 3 gifts heard

  1. Little Bit singing
  2. “We all love you.”
  3. “Yes ma’am.”

Dear God,

Please keep Princess in your arms tonight.  Protect her and guide her.  Please be with her mother to help her understand what she has done to her child.  Please be with me and Dale, and all the adults involved in her life that are trying to show her a better way.  This isn’t easy dear Lord.  This isn’t your plan for family.  But we know that in all things, your glory.  Help us to always live for your glory.

In His Name,  Amen



2 thoughts on “I should be asleep right now

  1. Hugs friend! I pray Princess came home. If not, keep reminding yourself that you made an impact on her life, whether you see the evidence of it or not right now. And your job is done with her (at least for now).


    • She did. The relationships seem to be healing, even if slightly. It might never heal completely. But it’s moving in the right direction. I’m just doing my best. I think she already sees there is a better way.


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