Begin Again

My life is so incredibly busy right now, but one thing is painfully obvious.

I need to be grateful.

I need to count my blessings, and I need to remember why I’m thankful.  So…  I’m starting again.

  1. A new job
  2. Computers
  3. Good friends
  4. Family

I’ll try to write more later this week, but that’s my starting point.


FMF – Purpose

It’s that time of the week.  The time where a flash mob of writers get together and write on a one word prompt.  Then we all come back to link up and read each other’s words and comment and support each other.

This week’s word is purpose.  And GO.


The dictionary defines it like this.

the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists

The Bible defines it like this.

Exodus 9:16

But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth

In other words, I was created to proclaim the power and name of God throughout the earth, to all the world.

I’ve really struggled recently with “what exactly is my purpose in life?”  I get really tired of being just a mom and just a wife.  Sometimes, I want to be “more.”

So then I start wondering what “more” means.  And it’s not being a big shot actress or a wonderful singer.  It’s not about being a world class researcher or famous artist.

Being more means praising God with my whole heart, my whole being.  My more in this instance, is to bring glory to God and doing what he asks me to.  Even if it’s just being the best mom that I can to my children.  Even if it’s simply praying for my friends when I tell them I’m going to, instead of saying it and never doing it.

My purpose is to give God the glory.  And that’s what I purpose (have as one’s intention or objective) to do.  STOP


Colossians 3:17

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.


[eta]  Alright, so I’ve now had 4 people remind me that I am more than “just a mom.”  Please understand that first of all, this is a free form writing exercise.  I very rarely have a plan for what I write, and it usually comes out as I’m writing.  So please remember that the words are just flowing from my fingers.

Secondly, I understand that as a mother, I have a grand purpose and design.  But as someone with a bachelor’s degree, I expected to not be a stay at home mother.  I thought I was going to go places and do things and have a career.  And when we struggle to pay bills on time, I often think about finding a job outside of the home. 

I am not negating the importance of being a mom.  But I want to be a person outside of being a mom, and sometimes that gets a bit lost. 

Third, the purpose of this writing was to remind myself and maybe you what my purpose in life is, and that is to worship God with my whole being, and in my heart and in my words and my thoughts.   Please don’t get wrapped up in my own struggle for validation that you miss the point.  God is the point.  He is always the point. 

I believe He asked me to stay home with my children, and I have.  I believe He asked me to teach them, and I have.  I believe He has asked me to be a part of the Renaissance Festival so that I could be an example to others there, and so I will be participating for a third year.  I do everything for Him. 

Including being “just a mom.”

FMF – Slow

It’s that time again. Time for the weekly flash mob of writers that come together to fellowship on Twitter and to write about the same one word prompt.  And then come back together and read what everyone else wrote.

Today’s prompt is slow.  And Go.

I am not slow.  Twitter is not slow.  The twitter party at #fmfparty is NOT slow.  Have you ever tried to follow two parties at once?  It’s a whirl wind.  It’s insane.

But sometimes we need to slow down.  We need to stop from the hustle and bustle and the constant stream of information.  Do we really need to have all the opinions and all the statements and all the …. stuff in a scrolling newsfeed that never ends?

Sometimes we need to slow down to hear God’s voice.  Sometimes we need to slow down so we can be still and actually hear what he has to say.

He says, “Be still, and know that I am God”  – Psalm 46:10  (NIV)

There was a time in Elijah’s life that he was forced to stop and slow down and hear God.

Picture this.  He had just had a huge fight with 850 false prophets.  God had answered Elijah in a bold way by burning up a sacrifice, an alter with all the stones and the wood, lots and lots and LOTS of water, and then God let Elijah put all those prophets to death. (1 Kings 18:16-40  NIV)

Then he prayed to God to end the drought that had lasted for over two years.  Not once, not twice, but EIGHT times.  And then he ran.  And ran.  And ran.  He was running for his life.  He beat a chariot, but he was running.  (1 Kings 18:41-46  NIV)

But God had him slow down.

The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.”  – 1 Kings 19:11 (NIV)

Elijah went out.  There was a wind.  There was an earthquake.   And there was a fire.  But Elijah had to calm down and really listen, because it wasn’t until there was a whisper that God passed by.


And after the fire came a gentle whisper. 13 When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.  – 1 Kings 19:12-13  (NIV)

God had to have Elijah slow down before he could hear Him.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to have God come at me with a wind, an earthquake, or a fire before I slow down enough to hear Him.

I’ve been studying a lot about prayer this year.  I think if we spend time with Him in prayer on a constant basis, we will slow down, and we will hear God.


I got distracted.  It’s kind of fun to have my girls watching a funny TV show, but my train of thought got sidetracked quite a lot tonight.  I know that this wasn’t exactly 5 minutes, but I did my best to keep it short.  Have a great night.


PS. Sorry, but I have to include a picture of my favorite slow animal.


FMF – Weak

It’s been so long since I’ve joined the FMF Twitter Party, but I’ve had a good reason.  We’ve been trying to develop a habit of family time, with no electronics.  Since Princess is the one with the crazy schedule, we let her pick when.  For the past month, it’s been on Thursdays.

So, FMF stands for Five Minute Fridays.  We get a one word prompt, and then writers from all over the country write for 5 minutes, non-stop, and not edited.  (Well, at least not much.)  😉  Then we go back over to Kate’s blog and link up and comment on each others’ posts.

So, for what feels like years, but was just a month, this week’s prompt is WEAK.


I am weak.  I am so very weak.  Partially because I’ve been sick for 2 weeks.  Partially because I’m female.  And partially, because I am just human.

I don’t always know what to do.  I don’t always do what I’m supposed to or act the right way.  I’m doing my fvery best, but sometimes, it just doesn’t feel like enough.

I’m weak.  I understand the whole, “I do what I don’t want to do and don’t do what I want to do” a whole lot more these days.  (It’s in Romans, but I’m not going to waste my 5 minutes looking for specifics right now.)

I can’t lift weights like my husband.  I can lift a baby, and sometimes a dog.  I can lift groceries and laundry.  But not squats and dead lifts like him.

And being sick has just made me tired.

But thankfully, God is here.  He is present.

Do you not know?
    Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
    the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
    and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
    and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
    and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.

Isaiah 40: 28-31  (NIV)

He gives strength to the weary, and increases the power of the weak.  God makes me strong.

26 In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.

Romans 8: 26  (NIV)

If I’m tired, all I have to do is ask.  The Holy Spirit will help me.  He will ask for what I need.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

2 Corinthians 12:9  (NIV)

I still have to wrap my head around this one, but I should be thankful that I’m weak, because it gives glory to God.

I don’t always like being weak, but I do like giving God the glory.




Noticing the Details

So I have been working on developing the habit of noticing the details.  It has been an interesting exercise.  I can’t say that I’ve noticed everything, but I have noticed more than normal.

One of the most interesting things I’ve realized is that I focus on smells and sights quite a bit.  The smell of bacon, the smell of a baking cake, the smell of a storm, the smell of Christmas dinner.  The sight of wrapping paper and lights, the sight of Little Bit when she was driving, the sight of bright icing colors on a cake, the sight of the model airplane doing a barrel roll, the sight of Boo when she was reading.

But I think the most beautiful thing I saw over the holiday break was the sight of Boo dancing in the front yard.  She was dancing to the music she was listening to, dancing in the sunshine and the warmth, arms open wide, and she was carefree.

I remember being like that.  Being carefree.  Dancing with music in my heart.  Not caring who was watching.  Feeling the warmth of the sun on my skin.

I loved watching her.  She is such a beautiful … well, I want to say child, but she’s not a child anymore.  She’s a beautiful young lady.

That’s the other thing that I’ve been noticing.  She’s not a child anymore.  She and Princess are growing up.  They are young ladies with their own opinions, their own points of view, their own choices, their own favorites and tastes.

I’m noticing that I’m not quite ready.  I’m not ready to face an “empty nest.”  Even though it won’t be exactly empty because Little Bit will still be here.  But I’m not ready for it.

So how do I let my girls stretch their wings?  How do I let them fly on their own?


I’m not sure.  I know a lot of it is through faith and prayer.  I know part of it is listening to them and encouraging them.  While I want to encourage them to be individuals, I also want to encourage them to stay faithful to God and His Word.  Other than that, I’m not sure anything can prepare a mother for what is coming next.

“Woman, why do you involve me?” Jesus replied. “My hour has not yet come.”

His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.”

John 2:4-5 (NIV)

So my request is this:  Please cover us in prayer.  Please, as we transition into this new part of our life, please pray for us.  Please pray that I can let my girls grow and be their own individual selves.  And pray that they will stay in God and continue to read God’s word.  For only when they stay with God can they truly soar!

but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.

Isaiah 40:31  (NIV)